Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Neighbours I have known: Part1

Hey, 2nd post in a single day, how about that!

As I cycled to work this morning, admiring the effects of the frost on fields, trees and hedgerows, dodging patches of ice and avoiding the wheels of speeding 4x4s, I remembered an old neighbour of mine. He was a source of constant entertainment (for all the wrong reasons).

He lived near us, having moved in with a single mother and her 5 children. He was a compulsive petty thief, tending to break into houses within about a quarter of a mile from where he lived. The Police got to know him very well but never seem to have been able to get the courts to impose sensible punishment (There I go again!). Seeing this, the kids started to try their hands too, and this is where things started to get more entertaining.

Arguments would break out, involving screaming matches that could be heard streets away. Eventually he would storm off to his mothers house - next door! Then, once he had calmed down, he would try to patch things up, usually by kneeling down on the door step calling through the door, saying thinks like "I really f&%$£& love you". What a charmer :-)

On hot summer evenings he would try to stir up mini-riots when a Police car came round on patrol. Always the first to shout abuse and thump on the car roof, he was also the first to disappear when reinforcements arrived. My wife and her friends used to sit on a fence and watch events, gladly giving the Police names and addresses of any 'rioters' that got away.

One evening I was heading out of my house to walk the dog and saw him walking in the same direction. He had failed to win her back, and declared that he was heading for the nearby train track to end it all. As we got close to the track it started to rain. I was OK, having a sensible coat on, but he was only wearing the t-shirt that he had been wearing when he was thrown out of the house.

"Oh, that's all I need", he said in disgust, turned around and went back to his mum's house!

What a guy...

3 comments:

amazingbrenda said...

lol! what a winnie!! Sounds like you live in a small town.

Logzie said...

Amazing-
Do you mean "Winnie" as in...the Pooh? Or "Weinie" as in...Oscar Meyer?

HA...just giving you a hard time there! I realize you are working on learning your 3rd language! Wow...that's pretty awesome!

P.S.-I agree...this guy does sound like a real winner!

Alyssa said...

That neighbour sounds like tons of fun :)

When we were living in our appartment, we had a woman who lived a few floors down and was a similar source of entertainment.

She once threw a couch off her balcony.